Day 3 of 2022

Tis a new year. I’ve seen quite a few of those 😂. I don’t really get optimistic about it being a fresh start or make resolutions – I think 2016 really f’d me up – what an awful year that was 😭. But truly, every day or new week is an opportunity for a fresh start and new goals. This works great for me, as I can fuck up a day or two and get back on track pretty quickly, whereas a whole year to wait for new resolutions? Yikes.


My day began shortly before 5am. I hadn’t quite fallen asleep yet. Normally I would consider this to have been the previous day, but the adventure of it all ended after 5am so I’m calling it Monday. If it happens after 5am, it’s time to call it a new day. It’s not important to understand that, I don’t either 🤪.

I had to perform “rocket surgery” on my grandma alone. This is what my mom calls it when we drain grandma’s lungs – and she’s an expert because she got her degree from doctor google. Sometimes you just have to laugh when things are so incredibly depressing. 🥴

The above photo is the bottle we hook grandma’s tube up to. The tube goes into her side and up to her lungs. Her body doesn’t process liquid correctly anymore so it ends up in there and if we don’t empty her out, she could drown. It’s all way over my head. I just know she is leaking from a few places she shouldn’t be.

Not too long ago while she was unsupervised in the bathroom, grandma undid the tape and gauze and yanked her tube out about an inch and a half and undid the stitches holding it in place. Talk about a scary experience 😱😬. Our hospice care team was a tremendous help and assured us that everything was a-ok as long as we can still get liquid out of the tube. Yes, it’s all working correctly.

However, every couple of days she starts leaking enough fluid around the insertion point that it fills up her tape covering and starts leaking like crazy. When she got up for her early morning bathroom visit, her shirt was soaked and the bed was soaked. Too early to get my mum up to help.

So, I performed the “rocket surgery” alone. The bottle system is super easy and straight forward. Getting all the wrappings and tape on afterwards is most assuredly the hardest part of the operation itself. Especially because tape HATES me. Even though it’s a giant sticky patch and doesn’t resemble tape all that much – I couldn’t get that thing on correctly and ended up using a whole lot of medical tape 😑. A persons side is such an awkward spot for taping.

This procedure is super painful for grandma 😭, as we’re basically draining stuff directly from her lungs. It hurts her shoulder and she wants to die every time. That’s why mum and me usually tackle this as a team, with grandma on the bed. This morning I had her sit on her walker as I had to completely redress her and the bed.

We got through it but by the end, she had forgotten who I was – she thought I was a nurse. This is the first time she couldn’t recall me. The pain or meds kicking in? I knew it would happen eventually, but it was hard 🙁.

Scrapt and Altered

Speaking of daily goals… One of mine is to get at least three magnets listed on the Etsy. I have been neglecting the hell out of that. I made a sale over the weekend, so I figure it’s about time to get my sh*t together and follow through. At least a few times a week 😂.

Got these up today (feeling very accomplished):

They can be found at or Scrapt and Altered on Etsy.

Thanks for reading this if you made it this far 😘.

Da’Nela, an American Misfit, [she/her/hers/trying to be humanish, maybe]
Monday, January 3rd

Trying To Be Humanish
Trying To Be Humanish
Day 3 of 2022

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