The following may be a possible trigger for anyone who’s had a relationship with a psycho. Read at your own discretion.
Journal Entry for TTBH; Topic: Sleep, #4
I’ve mentioned that I’m impossible to wake up when asleep? There is an exception to this which I’ll share below as this is a two-part storyline that involves the same person who I spent the majority of my teen years with.
The history of me and the one who shall be named PWLS (short for Psycho Wannabe Loser Scum-trust me, he deserves worse. Don’t believe me? I get it, a lot of people say such things about their exes -oh …and no, this is not the one that was invited over for dinner recently. Let’s just say later in life I got this ex sent to prison and it wasn’t for stealing or murder and it involved having my laptop confiscated by the police – see where that leads?) Anyhoo…
PWLS and I got together when I was in 10th grade, which may or may not be accurate as my high school years were not typical so tracking that time is difficult. What we had was a pretty intense, emotionally destructive relationship. I can look back on it and say yep – the posters on the wall at Planned Parenthood were right – I should have left his ass after the first week. We separated a lot though because of whatever drama was going on, we mutually despised and loved each other.
It’s crazy how much love and hate go together sometimes. If you are experiencing a relationship (with a friend, lover or family member) that you have extreme love and hate for…please step back from the situation and reevaluate what is happening and take steps to protect yourself 🥺 – you deserve better!
During one of our splits I was crashing at my moms house on the couch (Sounds strange right? Like shouldn’t I already live there? Yeah – didn’t do much of that past 8th grade 🙄.) and PWLS broke in and got video of himself holding a knife to my throat while I slept. Did not wake up for that. Didn’t even know about it until after we were back together again and a friend told me about it. Super fun times 😑. Turned into kind of a joke but it really wasn’t.
That was Part 1. Now for part 2…
There was a big problem with kids huffing crap among the other stupid things that teens find themselves getting into (drinking, smoking, etc.). That’s not really a new thing but sniffing gas and other poisons were definitely turning into a big issue that needed to be addressed at the time. Getting your kiddos to fess up to such nonsense – pretty much impossible. So, some big head came up with the idea that parents should ask their kids questions about drugs and other shenanigans that they weren’t supposed to be doing – while they were asleep.
Whispering a question in a sleeping persons ear apparently makes them respond truthfully. Scientifically speaking, I don’t know how accurate that is.
I do know that one surefire way to wake me up now is by talking – it can be across the house and not even loudly and I will register it. PWLS loved to ask me questions or tell me things when I was asleep. After getting shit for whatever I said in my sleep one time I had about enough of that bs. Somehow I became conditioned to wake up enough to register that it was happening. Faked my way through that nightmare 👿.
🤮 … thus ends this Journal entry. Haven’t thought or talked about any of this for a very long time… probably good to let it go.
true story from an American Misfit, [she/her/hers/trying to be humanish, maybe]
xoxo
-DH
